Robotomy

By on Oct 25, 2015 in Fiction

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Female and male android with moon colony
“You could leave them there if you like pain,” said Ollie. “I am equipped with an S&M mode, though it does cost quite a bit extra.”

“That’s okay, sweetheart. I’ll pass on that.” He began picking up the rocks and putting them on the desk. Larry sat on the edge of the bed.

“Now then,” said Larry as she sat on the chair facing him, lifting her knees, putting them together but keeping her feet apart so that her crotch was on display. “I just want to ask you a couple of questions.”

Brian rolled his eyes. “Next you’ll want to play cards with her. She’s not the whore with a heart of gold, Larry.”

“True,” said Ollie. “My core is titanium.”

“Shut up, Brian. I’m paying for this, remember? Okay, uh, Ollie. Do you ever think about anything other than sex?”

“Of course, silly boy. Eroticon is my main program, but I have lots of auxiliaries.”

“Such as?”

“Basic Survival and Adaptation. Human Emotion Recognition and Replication, Imagin4.”

“Imagin4? What can you imagine?” The way he stared at her crotch, she was sure the voluptuol was beginning to take effect.

“Lots of things.” She got up and sat on his lap so fast he couldn’t prevent it even if he’d wanted to. “I wouldn’t be much of a calldroid if I didn’t have imagination, now would I?” Her hand went right to his groin. She activated the ultravibe.

He squirmed a little. “Can you imagine being anything other than a whore?”

“Sure. Try me.”

“Well, how about a real woman?”

“I have an empathy program, but I mainly feel . . . pathos for the fleshling machine called woman. She is so hopelessly inefficient, having to undergo monthly bleeding ordeals and having erotic apparatus all tangled up with breeding mechanisms and excretory functions. I’ll never get PMS, yeast infections, AIDS, supersyph, gonorrhea, vaginitis —”

“All right all right, enough already. Please get off my lap.”

“Larry,” said the horny Brian, “you’re gonna get her out of the mood before I get a chance!”

“I just have a few more questions. Please, off my lap.”

Ollie wriggled off, swung around and sat again across from him.

“So you don’t envy women their physical beings,” Larry continued. “What about their freedom?”

“What freedom do they have with those bodies? I’ll show you freedom!” She quickly got up and straddled him, pressing her breasts against him. “Feel these lips! These siliboobs! Don’t they feel real to you? I even have a tongue.” She kissed him and writhed again on his lap.

“Go for it, Larry!” Brian cried. “Do you want me to turn off the terra-grav on my way out? It’ll be more fun at a sixth your weight!” He went for a switch on the wall.

“No. And don’t leave me alone with this machine!”

But Brian was out the door. Larry’s hands were on Ollie’s pants now. His will was no match for her seduction program, which by the way can only be activated after the client has paid. Larry was overwhelmed by an irresistible blend of ultravibe in her limbs, voluptuol in her breath, and Astroglide in her vagina. She squirmed on his lap until he grunted, groaned, and fell back on the bed exhausted. Ollie tongue-pressed a tooth-switch Wyxa had installed, activating another breath mist, somnol, which put the boy to sleep.

Brian came in to find his roommate snoring and Ollie emerging from the bathroom. “I douched,” she said.

“Thank you.” Brian grinned. “You wore him out, I guess.”

“His dreams are sweet. Now why don’t you undress me?”

“I won’t be as quick as Larry. No premature ejaculation for me.” But the somnol was all he got — a double dose just as he was unbuttoning her cami. He slumped and collapsed, eased a bit by her strong arms.

“Sorry, I’m no longer in the mood,” she said. It took her less than a minute to extract their tiny wrist implants. The imps would be useless to an ordinary potential identity thief, but Wyxa had yet to encounter a firewall she couldn’t crumble. Ollie carefully placed the imps in plastic pockets in her apron and left the boys there to sleep. The somnol would keep them snoring for several hours.

~~~

“Well done, Ollie.” Wyxa’s voice in our ears. “We will come for you now. Be outside the hotel in fifteen minutes. Have you changed your clothes?”

“Yes. I look as respectable as I’m allowed.”

“Good. I’ll be in touch.”

Wyxa addressed me and Lepp. “You two need to step out of me while I change my shape. Please stand at least ten meters away.” Lepp bounded out of the cabin and strode the distance before I even stepped onto the surface of the little crater Wyxa had created. Bounding out of the crater, we now stood silently on the mare and watched as Wyxa began to spin, the roboBobcat now becoming a dark blur. Soon darker blobs appeared in the blur, slowly resolving into the recognizable components of a hovercab: sleek hood, brightly lit oval cabin and streamlined rear. A door opened, and we ran to Wyxa, hovering a meter above the surface. We hopped into the cab, Lepp in front, I in back.

“Buckle up, my droids. We have a forni to rescue.”

~~~

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About

Joe Andriano's fiction has appeared in a variety of literary magazines, including The Chattahoochee Review, Louisiana Literature, Argonaut, The Southwestern Review, Louisiana Review and The Emergency Almanac. His short story, "Urania's Dream," won first prize for science fiction in the Deep South Writers Contest, and his yet-unpublished novel, The Circe Spell, was a semi-finalist in the 2014 New Orleans Faulkner Society Novel Contest. As an English professor at the University of Louisiana-Lafayette, Andriano has also published two books of literary/cultural criticism, Our Ladies of Darkness and Immortal Monster, and many articles in scholarly journals. He has recently abandoned academic writing, however, to devote himself wholeheartedly to the art of fiction.