Song
Parody of "Song" by John Wilmot, Earl of Rochester
By Stephanie Scarborough

                 Love a woman? You're an #%@!
                    I agree with Mr. Wilmot.
                 To choose out for your happiness
                    A woman's as good as a lump of rot.

                Who would want to share his room
                    With me and my girly crap?
                Why not live inside a tomb?
                    Or some luxurious death trap?

                 So don't hesitate to spend
                    Henceforth every night and sit
                With your lewd, well-natured friend
                    Drinking to engender wit.

                 And have your health, wealth, mirth, and wine
                    And don't fall in female clenches.
                 For you need no love of mine
                    With your page worth forty wenches.